Life is for Living Every Day

Celebrating Faith, Family, Love, Laughter


3 Comments

Once upon a time, they lived happily ever after … not

“May your fountain be blessed, and may you rejoice in the wife of your youth. A loving doe, a graceful deer– may her breasts satisfy you always, may you ever be captivated by her love.”  Proverbs 5:18-19 (NIV)

“I hate failure and that divorce was a Number One failure in my eyes. It was the worst period of my life. Neither Desi nor I have been the same since, physically or mentally.” ~Lucille Ball

IMG_20150517_113515_hdr

Photo by Gale E

I’ve found that men usually hesitate to talk, willingly or otherwise, preferring to steer away from intense communication.  It was the case in most of my relationships and it was definitely the case in my marriage.  Things would lie dormant, then fester and fester, like mold silently but consistently growing on old cheese.

When we finally discussed the issue, it would have grown from a dust ball into a mountain that could not be climbed far less surmounted. And then over time, it became too late; too late to recover from the everything that had led to nothing.

Continue reading


7 Comments

She Divorced Me Because I Left Dishes by the Sink | The Huffington Post

Quote by Matthew Fray

♥   ♥   ♥

Came across this thought-provoking article on The Huffington Post and found it really interesting, especially being a divorce statistic.  Isn’t it sad how hindsight involves a lot of 20/20 vision that was missing ‘before-sight’? I believe prevention is  better than cure but in some instances it takes two people to actively agree on the prevention steps, and even then there is no guarantee that the curing stage can be averted.

But let me not influence you yet. Read the article and then answer these questions:

  • Do you agree with Matthew Fray’s take here?
  • Was his wife being totally ridiculous aka a nit picker?
  • What do you think about their relationship?
  • Are you divorced? And if yes, was your divorce as a result of a seemingly petty inconsequential ridiculous situation?

Let’s get a conversation started 🙂

♥   ♥   ♥

She Divorced Me Because I Left Dishes by the Sink
by Matthew Fray

It seems so unreasonable when you put it that way: My wife left me because sometimes I leave dishes by the sink.

It makes her seem ridiculous; and makes me seem like a victim of unfair expectations.

We like to point fingers at other things to explain why something went wrong, like when Biff Tannen crashed George McFly’s car and spilled beer on his clothes, but it was all George’s fault for not telling him the car had a blind spot.

This bad thing happened because of this, that, and the other thing. Not because of anything I did!

Sometimes I leave used drinking glasses by the kitchen sink, just inches away from the dishwasher.

It isn’t a big deal to me now. It wasn’t a big deal to me when I was married. But it was a big deal to her.

Every time she’d walk into the kitchen and find a drinking glass by the sink, she moved incrementally closer to moving out and ending our marriage. I just didn’t know it yet.”  Read more

In my divorce, I stood up and said to my ex-wife, ‘Hey, I messed up. This had nothing to do with you. I didn’t understand what marriage was. I cheated. I was wrong. We couldn’t fix it; it got worse. I stepped away because I didn’t want it to get any worse. You’re the mother of my kids – I don’t want to hate you.’ ~ Kevin Hart

A divorce is like an amputation: you survive it, but there’s less of you. ~ Margaret Atwood

Divorce is never a pleasant experience. You look upon it as a failure. But I learned to be a different person once we broke up. Sometimes you learn more from failure than you do from success. ~ Michael Crawford