Life is for Living Every Day

Thoughts on Faith, Family, Love, Laughter & Life

Is it easier to give than to receive?

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Good friends can be hard to find.  Let me rephrase that: good genuine stick-by-you-no-matter-what friends are hard to find.  I don’t have a lot of friends but the few that I do have are loyal, loving, brutally honest and dependable.  I am lucky and truly blessed in this regard.  Yet I have noticed that although it may be easy to be a good friend to others it’s so much harder to be a good friend to yourself.  Why do we not think of ourselves as often as we think of others? Are we so fortunate to have sincere friends in our lives that it becomes that much easier to give than to receive?   In the end I conceded yes, it is more natural to think of others before ourselves and harder to ask our friends to be there for us even though we expect them to readily come to us when they need help.  Maybe we are too proud to ask or fear that we would appear to be a failure in some area. When I looked inwards, it wasn’t that I was too proud but more of being guilty in making presumptions e.g. everyone is really busy with their own lives so why would they try to fit me in? Or alternately, most everyone I know complains of financial challenges so how can I add mine to theirs?  Wouldn’t they think that I should have budgeted better?  How can I dare make this unreasonable request of my friend?

My closest friends will tell you that they only have to say the word and my time/money/whatever else is theirs.  Why then am I not giving them more of an opportunity to return the favour as such? To make matters worse, I love doing unexpected acts of kindness for others … but often fail to remember to do the littlest of things for myself – am I not just as worthy?

I am not sure if any of this is also true for you but it seems as though even Oprah has this problem (that of giving selflessly to others without a second thought for herself – click here to read:  While you think on the above, here is what the bible says about friends and friendship. In the end, all I can say is this: be a true friend to yourself while celebrating your friends and cherishing your friendships; make sure to go out and do something today for yourself and then for those who mean the most to you – because today is the only day we have to do what needs to be done.

♦ Verses for Reflection ♦

Ecclesiastes 4:9-11

Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work: If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up! Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone?

Psalm 55:12-14

If an enemy were insulting me, I could endure it; if a foe were raising himself against me, I could hide from him. But it is you, a man like myself, my companion, my close friend, with whom I once enjoyed sweet fellowship as we walked with the throng at the house of God.

Proverbs 12:26

A righteous man is cautious in friendship, but the way of the wicked leads them astray.

Proverbs 17:9

He who covers over an offense promotes love, but whoever repeats the matter separates close friends.

Proverbs 17:17

A friend loves at all times…

Proverbs 18:24

A man of many companions may come to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.


Author: galeweithers

Barbadian mother and lover of laughter; story teller and best-selling author; happy to follow God's lead and to live my mantra: "you've gotta be a rainbow in the lives of others when it rains."

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